hate mail.

now and then I think of when we were together, 
like when you said you felt so happy you could die. 
told myself that you were right for me, but felt so lonely in your company. 
but that was love, and it's an ache I still remember...


you can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness,
like resignation to the end, always the end
so when we found out we could not make sense
well you said that we would still be friends
but I'll admit that I was glad that it was over.


but you didn't have to cut me off.
make it like it never happened at that we were nothing
I don't even need your love, but you treat me like a stranger
and that feels so rough


no, you didn't have to stoop so low
have your friends collect your records and then change your number
guess that I don't need that though
now you're just somebody that I used to know.




the metallic taste of blood as it rids off the tongue, hate for one, rage and then some.
and what for? to re-live the numbing pain of betrayal? seriously? its said and done.

said.
done.
letting go.


let go.

bridges are burned. time wasted. but happy ever afters don't always exist for the weak and naive.
there's always a new leaf, a new page and its called moving on and moving forward.

ain't life grand? one moment you're in deep shit the next thing you know, you're dusting yourself off
and you find yourself trying again...

to get yourself in more deep shit. lol.

mistakes are a thing of the past. but it always lives with the present. the brain would seldom forget, but the memory seldom recalls, then somehow, it becomes real again. like a freshly scratched scar, a new wound.

all the planets would still move, earth would rotate, sun rises and still sets. apparently, stars would still fucking align to eventually lead you to another. bullshit! either way. its a slim to none chance that things would be the same.

but I'm not a full-pledge sinner, neither you, a saint.
no point counting sins if a line has already been drawn
there's an extension of heaven when it sees no hell.
though wishes are existent of your soul burning in one.

flames to dust.
all good things come to an end.

it was once a beginning, until it died a natural and DECEITFUL death.
gravity is not to blame if all we know has fallen.



already whistling a new tune
no more imprisoned thoughts.



only hate mails.



somebody that i used to know.














xoxo,


A.